[AI] Efforts towards matrimonial pursuit for blind; Suggestions invited

Vamshi. G gvamshiai at gmail.com
Thu Jul 12 22:52:26 EDT 2018


Thanks everyone for the really thoughtful discussion on the subject.

On 7/9/18, madhusinghal <madhu.singhal59 at gmail.com> wrote:
> Dear Alok,
> I really feel very happy to read what you have written?
> People should think more deeply about this subject.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: AccessIndia [mailto:accessindia-bounces at accessindia.org.in] On Behalf
> Of Preeti Monga
> Sent: Sunday, July 8, 2018 11:13 AM
> To: 'AccessIndia: a list for discussing accessibility and issues concerning
> the disabled.'
> Subject: Re: [AI] Efforts towards matrimonial pursuit for blind;
> Suggestions
> invited
>
> Hi friends! Great subject! This is mostly put away as far as visually
> impaired people are concerened!
>
> Well said  Alok! You have put this so very nicely!
>
> Just interact more  and look for someone who can  be your best friend and
> she/he may be the right personn for you to marry. But, one has to start
> some
> time! You have to start to take the risk, so if someone feels right to you,
> just go ahead and ask her/him! It may or may not work out! If it works then
> great, and if it doesn't work, then just part ways and try again!
>
> But, please do not marry a disability or a non disability, marry a human
> being! There is more chances for it to work if you marry a human
> being...rather than if you marry a qualification etc!
>
> There are great people out there and don't get into a box yourself and try
> to drag others into the box as well.
>
> Have fun and get married! It is a completely new world and worth
> experienceing!
>
> Preeti
>
>
> Preeti Monga - Chief Executive Officer
>
>
> Inspiring INCLUSION! Fostering DIGNITY!
>
>
> Mobile : 91 9871701646
> Landline : 011 22781446
> E-mail : preeti.monga at silver-linings.org
> Website : www.silver-linings.org
> Our Services: Recruitment, Trainings- Unique Motivation Programmes,
> Diversity & Inclusion, POSH.
>
> Your Choice to partner with us contributes towards quality Education &
> Empowerment of Visually Impaired Girls, and providing them with secure
> Hostel facility at SHIKSHA (A CSR Initiative of Silver Linings)
>
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: AccessIndia [mailto:accessindia-bounces at accessindia.org.in] On Behalf
> Of Alok Kaushik
> Sent: 07 July 2018 14:14
> To: 'AccessIndia: a list for discussing accessibility and issues concerning
> the disabled.'
> Subject: Re: [AI] Efforts towards matrimonial pursuit for blind;
> Suggestions
> invited
>
> Hi Vamshi,
> Here is  my take on this subject. These views are in a wider  context and
> not specific to any individual. You' in this mail refers to everyone
> thinking about this and not just you.
>
> You need to ask yourself some basic questions.
>
> 1. What is your reason for getting married? Is this reason strong enough to
> provide the basis of a good  relationship?
> Many blind people are looking for sighted partners. While this may bring
> some practical convenience for one person, it does not form a strong basis
> for a  healthy marital relationship. Marriages are bound to go through
> their
> phases over a period of time, and preparing oneself to be dependent on one
> person is a recipe for disaster.
>
> 2. What is it that  you will bring to the relationship?
> Most of us have an idea about what kind of person we are looking for and
> how
> we would like them to be involved in our lives, but have we given enough
> thought about what we would be adding to  the relationship? Does that
> makes
> the relationship more balanced?
>
> 3. If we are primarily looking for a companionship for long term, are these
> channels of bringing unknown people together good enough sources to ensure
> that you will get the companionship that you are looking for?
> Best would be to increase your sphere of interaction and observe what
> naturally evolves and appeals. And if someone appeals, have the courage to
> express that, even if it is at the cost of risking the relationship.
>
> Marriage and job have a lot of similarities. Some organizations may have a
> bias against hiring people with disability while others may have better
> inclusion and diversity policy. Even though 10 options may not work out, at
> the end of it you need just one job, and likewise you need just one good
> relationship to carry on. There are employers who hire disabled people and
> then do not use them to be an equally participating and productive
> individuals. There could be a similar situation in a marriage, and that is
> definitely not a desirable one.
>
> We overly emphasize on our disability. There are many other aspects in a
> person that could make a person appealing enough to someone who is  able to
> recognize and value them. After a while disability becomes less important
> and how you are as a person becomes fundamental.
>
> While social sensitization is  essential, it is a long drawn approach, and
> may or may not result in a significant transformation during the  timeframe
> that you may be interested in. So far we have not even been able to
> convince people within the visually impaired community that  it is alright
> to marry a person with disability, even though they may  have seen two
> individuals with disability leading a reasonably decent married life.
>
> While we can intend to bring about a change in the world, actually we
> cannot
> change anyone other than ourselves.
>
> Thanks.
> Alok
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: AccessIndia [mailto:accessindia-bounces at accessindia.org.in] On Behalf
> Of Vamshi. G
> Sent: 07 July 2018 08:13
> To: accessindia
> Subject: [AI] Efforts towards matrimonial pursuit for blind; Suggestions
> invited
>
> Dear friends,
>
>
> I, as someone gradually loosing vision, have been in pursuit of a girl for
> marriage for the past few years.  But as everyone knows, blindness presents
> its own obvious limitations and societal misperceptions due to which it
> becomes difficult to find success.
>
>   I found success on Access India for many issues like coping with
> blindness, technology, legal provisions, independent living etc. Now, I
> would like to invite suggestions from my dear Access Indian friends on this
> issue.
>
> The following are the channels available :
>
> 1.  Traditional channels like marriage fairs, matrimonial sites, etc.
>
> 2.  Special on line channels like ability matrimony, Inclov, etc.
>
> 3.  Special get togethers organised by Inclov, Radio Udaan, voice vision,
> etc.
>
> 4.  References from close circles, especially from those associated with
> blind friends.
>
> I already contacted some of my  friends on Access India who are helping me
> out.  And I found this channel to be most fruitful as they are more
> empathetic towards fellow blind friend.  Now, I would like to invite
> suggestions from members of this forum on this issue.  Please share your
> experiences, strategies you have adopted, any new ideas, etc.
>
> Please feel free to write on the forum as it would help others like me.
> But
> if you have something to discuss privately, write/call me on the contact
> details provided in the signature line.
>
> As they say,  "An idea can change your life".  Hoping for such life
> changing
> ideas!(smile)
>
>
> --
> G. Vamshi
> Mobile: +91 9949349497
> Skype: gvamshi81
>
> WWW.VIBEWA.ORG
> EQUALITY AND DIGNITY
>
>
>
>
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> Disclaimer:
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> person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity;
>
> 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the mails
> sent through this mailing list..
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> Disclaimer:
> 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of
> the
> person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity;
>
> 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the mails
> sent through this mailing list..
>
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>
> Disclaimer:
> 1. Contents of the mails, factual, or otherwise, reflect the thinking of the
> person sending the mail and AI in no way relates itself to its veracity;
>
> 2. AI cannot be held liable for any commission/omission based on the mails
> sent through this mailing list..
>


-- 
G. Vamshi
Mobile: +91 9949349497
Skype: gvamshi81

WWW.VIBEWA.ORG
EQUALITY AND DIGNITY



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